Q-BLOG #29 Love and Fear

I received an email from my former partner/companion. I had not heard from him in quite some time. I was amazed at the rush of emotions that came to the surface in just seeing his name. I thought about our relationship and the things we shared, the things we didn't and how, when you love someone that much, it can come to an end. Of course mistakes were made, feelings were hurt and a host of other things happened to separate us. Yet, this emotion rises in me each time I see him, hear his voice or see his name. And always, I tell myself I need to let go and move on. I would say I've been successful on occasion, but mostly I have not. Somehow, though it is different, this love has survived.

I am reminded each time this happens what I learned as a child. We were told, "God loves you so much, that no matter what you do, he will always remember you and be with you." Can you imagine that kind of love? Can you even fathom the incredible power of that love? No fear, just love. No fear, just forgiveness. No fear. No fear. No fear.

There were two articles in the opinion page of The Stars and Stripes not long ago. They caught my interest because the views being expressed were in regard to Fear. Bill Tammeus' opinion was titled, "Be afraid of a fear rooted in ignorance..." with a quote from Franklin D. Roosevelt next to it, "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." The second opinion/view was from Alberto J. Mora and the title was a continuation from the first title and went, "...and of what happens when fear clouds judgment." You can go the Stars & Stripes Mideast Edition on line and read the entire article (Thursday June 1, 2006, OPINION). I've included a few highlights from both viewpoints. (www.estripes.com)

First from Bill Tammeus:
" Fear, the man says, is at the center of religion today. Fear makes us wary of anyone outside our circle. It makes us draw that circle ever tighter. It spills over into all of our lives so we move into gated communities, buy costly security systems and allow our government to infringe on our civil liberties in the name of security." " ... Fear, after all, has helped to create the poisonous atmosphere in which today's political and religious rhetoric simply drips with anger and hatred. What we need to hear, I think is in the spirit found in this passage from the New Testament book of 1 John: ' There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear.' " " But fear that locks down our hearts and makes security an idol is a destructive force that builds high walls instead of wide bridges...This kind of fear suggest we aren't interested in truth beyond our version of it because we are falsely confident about that version. It says we don't see others as brothers and sisters. It says we are unwilling to take risks to help others."

From Alberto J. Mora:

"In regard to detainee abuse and the infamous decision by the US courts to place American citizens of Japanese ancestry in detention camps knows as the Korematsu decision. ' Korematsu reminds us that when threats and fear converge, our laws and principles can become fragile. ' " "Our forefathers, who permanently defined our civic values, drafted our Constitution inspired by the belief that law could not create but only recognize certain inalienable rights granted by God--to every person, not just citizens, and not just here, but everywhere. Those rights form a shield that protects core human dignity. In this war, we have come to a crossroads: Will we continue to regard the protection and promotion of human dignity as the essence of our national character and purpose, or will we bargain away human and national dignity in return for an additional possible measure of physical security? Why should we care? We should care because the issues raised by a policy of cruelty are too fundamental to be left unaddressed, unanswered or ambiguous. We should care because a tolerance of cruelty will corrode our values and our rights and degrade the world in which we live. It will corrupt our heritage, cheapen the valor of the soldiers upon whose past and present sacrifices our freedoms depend, and debase the legacy we will leave to our sons and daughters."

How do we move from our fears in life to a less fearful place? I'm not sure, but I believe if we maintain respect and dignity for ourselves and others, in the face of fear, we will make the right choices and decisions that lead to a less fearful place. If we lose respect for ourselves and others we begin to make choices and decisions that lead us toward more fear. I am reminded of Peter the apostle. After Christ was taken into custody and as others saw Peter and questioned whether he in fact was a follower of Christ, he did the thing that he swore to Christ he would never do; he denied he knew Christ. He was afraid. Because of his denial he lost some self respect and dignity. He would make different choices in the future.

As a privileged people in the world, Americans have choices that many in the world do not. It is because we have those choices that we also bear the burden of insuring "certain inalienable rights granted by God--to every person, not just citizens (of the U.S.), and not just here, but everywhere.", are protected and provided. We have the power, the wealth and the knowledge to make decisions that are not based in fear.

I don't know if they have anything to do with each other, but the emotion that rises in me when I hear from my former partner is similar to when I hear about an act of kindness extended to someone in need. Maybe it is similar because of the memory I have as a child, "no matter what you do or who you are, God loves you". As an adult I've come to understand that each of us comes from the same place, that we are connected to each other and what we do to each other represents our understanding or lack of understanding of Love, or God, or the Universe and how we fit in. Fear is always with us as Peter can well attest. So is forgiveness and Love. We will most likely continue to make decisions out of fear. Our opportunity exists in how we respond after making those decisions. Will we move in the direction of Love and forgiveness or continue to make decisions from fear?

I close this with a quote from one of my favorite movies, Spiderman.

"With great power comes great responsibility"

Make choices out of love, overcome fear. Remember that we have been given much and so much is expected.

Blessings and Peace.

Robert