Q-BLOG #32 Smallville

Smallville or the Mustard Seed

This past week I’ve been watching on DVD the TV series Smallville. For those not familiar with this series, it is basically the life of Clark Kent, Superman, growing up. I’ve become fascinated with this series because of the constant battle between good and evil, secrets and truth. The thing that grapples me is that on the outside it is about the good vs.. evil of people in general and the same with secrets and truth. It is also about the inner battle of these forces within each of us.

Yesterday during my viewing of the show, the town of Smallville was in the middle of encountering a meteor shower, when we were mortared. It was a huge BOOM! The trailer shook and I fell to the floor and waited. Nothing more came. As I was walking the lake earlier today, I thought about this coincidence and it made me think about the duality in each of us. It made me think about the duality in our world and the struggle for a balance between “the Force” and “the Dark Side”. Not only as in the struggle between Lex Luthor and Clark Kent, but the struggle within each of them and each of us.

There have been several letters to the editor of the Stars and Stripes these past weeks dealing with gays and marriage and sins and love on either side of the issue of two people who love each other that are of the same sex becoming a legal couple in the eyes of the state. The one comment that goaded me most was that of loving the sinner, but not the sin and then comparing gays to child molesters, murders and rapists. I had to laugh (an evil laugh) because most child molesters, murders and rapists are heterosexuals who have the right to marry. What did not make me laugh was the absence of the thought of and spirit of love. Murderers, child molesters and rapists do not love those who they focus their attention on. They do not want to create a life and a family with them. In fact, they most likely do not love themselves. It bothers me that if anything, you would think that people would be jumping at the chance to place gay people in loving relationships and building families. But fear comes in and fear is what keeps people at the 1st level of understanding. The level that says killing is only physical. The level that says loving is only biological. The level that says family is only blood.

These thoughts continued as I walked around the lake. Suddenly a light went on in me. But it wasn’t a light. It was a mustard seed. It was an understanding of the mustard seed that I’ve never had before. Why a mustard seed? It is biblical. It is powerful. It is modern. It is the smallest of seeds that create this incredibly large plant. It is the faith of the mustard seed on fertile soil that came into my thoughts. And there with the mustard seed was Lex Luthor and Clark Kent. Mother Teresa and Adolph Hitler. They were swirling in my mind and words of doubt and fear and love and hate swirled in my head. Gay people and witches and black people and Japanese and poor people and rich people and choices and fear and fear and love…and the mustard seed.

Within each of us is a mustard seed. This I believe without a doubt. The fertile soil can indeed be how we were raised, but salt can be put on fertile soil. The salt of doubt, fear, anger, of disapproval- of so many things. I’ve learned in my life that the crowd is not always right and in fact, is usually fickle. I’ve learned that just because someone can quote the bible and go to church does not make them a good or decent person. I’ve also learned that just because someone is an outcast and does not follow the norms of society does not mean that they are bad, or wrong. It goes back to the mustard seed.

You can name this little seed inside you whatever you like. The soul. The Holy Spirit. The God within. The Conscience. The Force. But it is there. And when we listen to it, fertilize it and allow it to grow, it is incredible. If we feed it, but don’t give it enough sunlight or water, we allow it to live, but not to reach its full potential. We in fact, limit it. When you allow it to love, you allow it to grow into a force that can indeed move mountains or run faster than a speeding bullet.

The times in my life that I felt absolutely invincible were those times that I was in love. Not simply in love with another person, but in love with myself and able to express my love to another person, fully. The phrase, the Commandment that simply came to mind to reflect the mustard seed was the second. Love thy neighbor has thy self. But there is an assumption in this commandment that I had not seen or understood before. It is an assumption even for the first Commandment. The assumption is that we indeed, love ourselves. For God would not want us to hate our neighbor as ourselves. The assumption that we love ourselves and therefore we would love our neighbor and bring them no harm is implicit.

There is much happening in the Middle East at the moment. There is much happening in the world. I looked in the newspaper for a sign of the mustard seed. I did not find it. I looked at the TV news for a sign of the mustard seed. I could not find it. I listened on the radio for a sign of the mustard seed. I could not find it. Then I walked the lake this afternoon and looked inside myself for a sign of the mustard seed….and I found it. It is starting to grow in this desert. It is finding that even in arid sand in the middle of a war, it can grow as long as there is love. It is love that provides all that we need. I used to laugh a sarcastic laugh at that phrase. After all, Love is only for lovers and poets. Then I discovered that I was a poet and understood. Love can provide everything because love will move mountains; climb the highest peak and walk the most arid desert to survive and to help others live their full potential.

There was a secret meeting that took place in Germany during the middle of WWII. It was convened to get support and provide for the final solution of the Jewish question. There was a German scientist who was against this and though he tried to convince the Commander of this meeting, he was ultimately swayed against his better judgment. In trying to sway the Commander, he told a story of a son who grew up hating his father but loving his mother. Years passed by and the mother died. And though the son thought that he would surely cry at his mother’s death, no tear was shed. Soon after his father died and the boy cried and indeed sobbed. The boy was shocked by this, for he so hated his father and had focused his energies on this hate that he certainly felt he would never cry at his fathers passing. But he did more than that, he sobbed.

The moral of this story is that when you focus your life on hate and when you lose the focus or the “thing” that the hate was directed at, you discover that you have indeed wasted your life and energy on hate. Had the focus been love, than all understanding of things can move from love and there is no sorrow and no regret.

Forget about hating the sin. Forget about hating. Simply love and that mustard seed will produce joy unimaginable.

Choose Love over fear.

Cultivate your mustard seed and watch it grow!

Blessings and Peace,

Robert